The power of creating room for growth and change, and embarking on a journey of self-discovery, is the central theme of this deeply enriching episode. In this heartfelt conversation, Dr. Sylvia Morris and Dr. Angela Walker warmly welcome Susan Johnson, a vibrant New Yorker, nurse, mother, and seasoned world traveler. Susan shares her inspiring story of navigating life’s twists and turns, from overcoming early challenges to finding her passion in nursing later in life. She delves into the importance of making space for new beginnings, the courage to redefine oneself, and the wisdom gained from personal evolution. Listen as Susan offers profound insights on wholeness, relationships, and the significance of self-care, particularly the practice of “dating yourself,” providing invaluable guidance for women seeking to embrace transformation and live more authentically. This episode is a beautiful blend of laughter, vulnerability, and empowering revelations, making it an essential listen for anyone ready to create clear space for new things in their own life.
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Clearing Space For New Things: A Journey Of Self-Discovery With Susan Johnson
How To Make Room For Growth And Change
Reflecting On Wisdom: Advice For 30-Year-Old Selves
We had a fantastic conversation with Susan Johnson. She talked about solo travel, the importance of dating yourself and advice she would give to your, her 30-year-old self. Angela, what advice would you give to your 30-year-old self?
Yeah, Sylvia, I thought about this. There’s so much advice. I’m in my fifties now.
Where were you when you were in your early 30s?
At this moment in time, I was pregnant and about to give birth to my first daughter, Alexis. I was in my third year of residency in OBGYN, specifically doing GYN ONC, Gynecologic Oncology. Into the hospital at 5:00 in the morning and all those things. I was a wife and doing all the wife things. It was a lot. I think what I would tell her now is, I think, number one, you’re doing good. You’re doing well.
You’re at this point in life, and you’re trying to do your best for your family as a wife and as a mother. Trying to create a healthy environment for this baby to come into the world, but also holding it down in your training and showing up. That would be one. What I think probably would be most important is to tell her to prioritize mental wellbeing as much as physical wellbeing.
I don’t think I’ve ever had a hard time prioritizing physical wellbeing. I was an “athlete.” Growing up, always athletic, tomboy. I put that in air quotes now compared to my kids who were true athletes, but mental wellbeing, that wasn’t really even in my vocabulary until really my late 40s, 50s. I’ve always had a spiritual life where I prayed.
In terms of mindful behavior, journaling, meditating, just having quiet time to reflect on taking inventory, part of that equation is just having a practice of taking inventory, what’s working, and then what’s not working. When you can identify what’s not working, what are you going to do about it? Is there something to rectify that can you make changes?
Can I add something, though? You were grinding, girl. You were a wife, you were pregnant, you were a resident, and residency is not for the faint of heart. Residency, I think, is the hardest part of the whole medical school journey, the journey to become a physician. It is just a grind physically, on your mental wellbeing, because it’s always that thing of not knowing enough. I’m digressing. My point is that I think in our 30s, we were just trying to move forward and do all the things so that we could then be able to hopefully get a job and have a moment to take a breath. We didn’t have time to do all that.
That’s the part I think that the way we grew up and way we were moving in the world is we’ll do that later. We’ve got to do all these things and then we’ll have time to relax and take care of ourselves.
Delayed ratification. It’s the devil.
Yes. How about you? What would you tell yourself?
You really helped me think about it, because I don’t know. I, too, was a resident. I was living in Seattle. At that point, I think I thought my life was going to be in Seattle. I was dating this guy. I was like, “I’m going to do this.” I would say off the top of my head, to have more fun and to be kinder to yourself. Me being kinder to myself allows me to be kinder and have more compassion for other people. It was just a grind. You get in that grind mode and trying to, for me in particular, get to that next opportunity. Having that next accomplishment but not really savoring or really, truthfully, for me being grateful about where I am now.
Delayed gratification, the bear trap is that you keep looking down the road. You’re looking down the road, but where you are right now, I was like, “No, I graduated from medical school. Actually, a good medical school. I’m paying my bills and I’m saving, and I’m doing all these things.” It’s that trap of like, “I need to get to the next thing.” The next thing is getting a job. At that time, I thought I was going to be a fellow and all the things. Be where you are right now, girl, and enjoy yourself is what I would say.
It’s hard because with the retrospective scope is what I like to call it, hindsight, it’s easy for me to say now, “Yeah, I would’ve been nice if you had done that.” If you had told me that, then I’d been like, “Girl, you lost your mind. I’ve got to get to A, B and C because my mother sent me to medical school. You get into that whole mode thing.
Hence, the reason for Boss Leap, so we can share what we’ve been through, and maybe pass some knowledge along, whether it’s somebody younger or someone our age, just to stop. I think, Susan, if you read the entirety of the episode, it’s almost like spoken word at the end where she was just being joyful in every moment, being able to wake up and see the sunrise and the moon go away in the morning and for all the little things. That means being appreciative of every single day. I can’t wait for us and our audience to get into this episode. I’m grateful to you and grateful to Susan. Without further ado, we’ll get right into this episode.
We are in for a treat. We have Susan Johnson. She is a New Yorker, a Nurse, a mother, a world traveler, and just an awesome spirit. Susan Johnson, welcome to Boss Leap.
I cannot wait to hear all about your story. I know that there’s a lot to talk about here, so I think we’re just going to jump right in and get into the basis of what we end up talking about with the women that are on this show is always fascinating. In terms of where your journey began, when you were young, Susan, maybe what you wanted to be, what life was like for you?
Early Life’s Rebel: Susan’s Journey To Self-Understanding
Young Susan was a bit of a mess. Young Susan is probably something that looked a little bit now like a fantasy. I was a little bit of a rival to life when I was younger. I had lots of anger and I didn’t quite know where I fit in. I was the last of seven children. The dynamics of my family was strange. I didn’t learn that until later. I thought we were the norm. Towards my early childhood, I realized that we weren’t like the dynamics of a normal family.
I had stepsisters and brothers. I discovered that I was a product of my mother trying to reconcile her marriage and them having different relationships out of the marriage. That was intriguing when I was younger. Of course, as I aged, I understand relationships are complicated and you can love people without having so much constraints for what’s right and wrong, so to speak.
Seventh child, born on Wednesday. I’m a Cancer, July 30th. I had lots of problems fitting in when I was younger. I just could not figure out why this lady and this man would have me if the ideal circumstances weren’t available. As I figured out towards, like I was saying, earlier in my childhood days, it tested me and it made me very angry. I was a rebel.
May I ask in terms of just finding out about you, about what age do you think you were when you found this out and how it started to affect you?
I probably was around 12 or 13. The girly girl, childhood run around tomboy thing was wearing off. The pubescent part of me started to develop, and it was an awakening of relationships and real dynamics of the family and trying to put things in place because we talked, but it wasn’t like, okay, this is how things go. It was more of my parents’ survival and taking care of so many children with so many different personalities. That part of things was hard to figure out when you’re the last of seven.
A lot of it was morphed into jealousy of my other sisters, trying to get my mom’s attention, trying to figure out where my real father was versus my mom’s husband who was the caregiver and my parent who basically raised me. Those things played a lot of movies in my head about who really are. Earlier on, that made me angry and I was a bit of a pill of a kid. I didn’t set things to my family and myself that I probably am not proud of. It definitely set the fundamental groundwork for me to figure out some real deep things about persons and how we come to be.
Finding Your Path: Advice To Young Susan And Teens Today
If I hear you right, to me, it sounds like a teenager, pre-teen teenager that is faced with a new reality that you are not sure how to deal with. Who knows that as a teenager? I can’t imagine being in your shoes, but obviously, you are thriving now. I’m curious, what would you tell your younger self, or what do you think would’ve helped you in that stage to process?
I thought about that because I did have a little idea from your setup that that might be asked. I would tell her you don’t have to. You absolutely don’t have to.
You don’t have to fit in.
You don’t have to fit in. You don’t have to go with your friends. You don’t have to try that. You don’t have to be that. You don’t have to. You have the choice. I tried to fit in, so I did things that probably was against my better judgment, but because I wanted to be a part of something, I didn’t know exactly how to navigate that. I think I did things that maybe all teenagers do similar things. When I look back, I wish sometimes that I had the wherewithal to think through some things and not feel like I had to.
You don't have to fit in with your friends; you don't have to try that; you don't have to be that. You have a choice. Share on XYou also live to tell the tale. We are grateful.
Thank you so much for sharing. I mean that. Many people go through things that we never really realize how it can shape us. I think, overall, it can help someone who may be dealing with that in their family. I appreciate that. Thank you for being transparent.
Susan, you are a mother of 3 or 4?
Four and raised so many more.
Intentional Motherhood: Raising Children With Grit And Purpose
I know you have. Tell us, how did that shape your experience as a parent?
I carried a lot of that anger and not fitting in. I did and said and became things that probably was not my true character. I’ve had children out of those relationships. All of them, loving all of them on purpose. I thought about that really intently. I’m from the city of New York, of course, and so I have a grind in me that is innate. I’m not sure how New Yorkers get to be New Yorkers like soul-wise, but certainly impacted on your personality to have grit.
If you don’t, you don’t survive.
It had components of nostalgia and part of history and that thing. I got that early on. Trying to develop myself for a woman to have family, it was relationships that, “I’m going to be the girlfriend now, and now we are in love, and so I should have a kid.” Marriage wasn’t part of that setup. Always, I think some of the dynamics from my family early on didn’t make that be very prevalent or important, really. I had children without that.
As I grew older, I thought of the bond of relationship and sanctity of it, but marriage wasn’t really something that I attained to. I did want children, though, so I had them. I’m certain that I made good choices to have my children, but they were pretty much intentional, real choices. I could have done other things and treated myself in the way of protection better not to have them, but I intently made my children, and I’m so grateful for that now.
Peeling back a little bit on marriage, what do you advise like your nieces and nephews now about marriage and the importance, or not the importance of it? What are your thoughts on that?
For them to examine what their thoughts on it is. Basically, it’s like all things. What somebody might say to you is for everybody or traditions for family or culture, you have to be whole first before you engage in relationships just about with anybody.
You have to be whole first before you engage in relationships with anybody. Share on XEspecially say that for the people in the back row.
Especially those of intimate relationships where offspring is possible and that thing, because you’re tethered, to a certain extent, to that person’s life forever, their past traumas and their development and growth. The commitment for that is an endeavor that shouldn’t be taken lightly. If you have relationships where you can have all those things without getting married, perhaps that’s okay too. I’m a real observer of those.
Susan, I want to pull the thread about wholeness. When I think about my own personal wholeness, I think of that as a journey. I think for me, it started probably when my mom died, because you have to grow up at that point, or at least I did. It really moved forward as I started my therapy journey because I know I was operating on all the stuff that my mom had taught me. The stuff that I learned from my father’s relationship with his wife, my stepmother, but my own personal wholeness that I own is a continual evolution. Can you talk about how you have gotten to wholeness or how your wholeness is evolving and how do we do it hopefully earlier?
The Evolving Journey To Wholeness: Personal Growth And Realizations
So much respect for who you are based on how you gleaned whatever from your mom and your dad and their relationships. I think that probably is something I leaned into very early on. I saw so much dysfunction and, again, the dynamics of what I thought family should be. When it wasn’t part of my choices for life, almost things were like handed to me, or I developed at a rate that maybe would’ve been what they used to call fast.
Were you a fast girl? Is that what you were telling me?
I was a fast girl. I had to realize adult things pretty much early in my life. Also, I saw a lot of things with my siblings that weren’t positive. I think the era we were in and that sort of thing when I was mentioning about nostalgia. Growing up in Long Island, New York and Harlem, you’re confronted with things maybe children shouldn’t see early in life. Those were part of my everyday realities.
Relationship-wise, when you couple all that in, and you think a lot of times you have no idea who you are and something, and so examine that. Now I can see observationally but then, you’re like in the middle of something. If you get the opportunity, young people, if I’m speaking to youth now, then I would say to them that there’s some things that you have to know inside yourself first, some real groundwork things about intention, about purpose. That’s awful hard when you’re real young.
There are things you have to know within yourself first—some real groundwork things about intention and purpose. Share on XTime to weave through some of those things early on in life to figure out your purpose to yourself. Am I somebody who could stand a dirty house? Things that you think are not part of our relationship, that person left that sock there every day, how would that land on me? If they didn’t brush their teeth or have good hygiene, those are things that come up in relationships that you love this person, you think they’re neat.
They have all the bells and whistles for animal attraction, the fuzzy feel good stuff. As a young woman, you find out early on what feels good sometime is not good for you. You have to be awful sure about who you are, so that certain things for somebody else’s comfort, I used to say something like, early on, I set myself on fire for others to be warm. That was something I had to grow out of and find that part of me that could warm myself.
I think you can just drop the mic with that one. I got a visual and a heart feel all at the same time. Thank you so much for sharing. On relationship standpoint, I think you’re spot on in the concept of wholeness. In reality, unfortunately, at 14, 18, 20 years old, unless we have an that all around just really wonderful relationship experience that we’ve seen around us, we don’t necessarily get it. Unless there’s some counseling, therapy involved, and sometimes wholeness doesn’t come until later in life.
If at all. There’s some 50-year-olds who are not whole. I’m not calling names. I’m just saying.
The beauty of us sharing experiences maybe will help someone that that’s walked in your shoes or in similar paths. Thank you so much for sharing. I’d like to turn to your career if we can, just because I want to really learn more about that and all the interesting things that you’ve done since you were a child. One I’d like to talk about is your career in nursing. What first drew you to nursing and how has your perspective on care changed over the years?
Finding A Calling: Susan’s Unexpected Path To Nursing
Also an oddity. I happened into nursing. My life was turning into a series of poor choices. I had children by then. I want the best always still for my kids. I didn’t always want that for myself, but they were a catalyst to that part of myself. I had to decide about I need something, not just a job. I need something that I could raise them and give them benefits. Career wasn’t like something that I grew up thinking of.
Later on, after just having so much financial problems and jobs weren’t working out, I did hair for a little while, those things were good. The lifestyle for that was pretty much similar to the things I was talking about in New York, exposed you to a lot of things that might’ve not been conducive to raising a family. That fast pace, I just saw that as a deterrent from me parenting my kids and having them be safe.
I decided that I needed a career. The first part of that was education. I love learning. I’m somebody who’s always been inquisitive and challenging what people think is normal. I’ll say I oftentimes, I thought of things that people would say and say, “I don’t know if that’s right,” but that set off in me a discovery mode. I did that with my children. I wasn’t able to talk back to my mom and my dad. We had to be a certain way around adults.
I allowed my kids to do all of those things. Through that, my oldest daughter was key and me finding a career, and she said, “Ma, you care for people. You’re smart.” I balanced some of that teaching. I would learn things and try to share it. I went to the college to do interview to see an aptitude test on what I was good at. The counselor told me that the track for school and teaching was four years, but they had a program for nursing, LPN, that was thirteen months. I was like, “I’m a nurse.” It was basically because I could get a career quickly and earn more than I could as a teacher, which is a little bit shameful. Those were realities and pretty much still are.
Just for clarity, you went to your local community college in New York City or on Long Island?
Actually, in Florida. By this time, my mom had escaped her life and went to Florida to try to find her niche in peace. That was where our extended family was. She had moved there. I lived there for a short time. I went back to New York and stayed with my dad, worked in his business. Once I got pregnant with my oldest daughter, I went back to Florida. I did that for a few times.
I thought about myself having kids and being somewhere like New York and had an opportunity to go back to Florida and be in a relationship with a guy. I actually married him. There, I discovered I needed to have my own way forward. In the marriage or not, I needed to have a way to manage my life and my children. That’s where I started college in South Florida Community College.
Do you mind sharing how old you were then when you started?
I was 33 years old.
That’s great. I love those stories because at that stage in life, it’s just never too late. Oftentimes, you are more motivated and have more incentive to make that path work out. I love those stories. Good.
Nursing has been an exquisite path for me because at all the things, really dark times in my life and ends of relationships, having children dynamics with my family, it has been the one constant thing that has helped me develop my sense of who I am. It is divine to me in that sense, because I didn’t know that was what it would lead to. I think the powers of spirit and you get really what you are kind of thing landed on me just right. I was able to lean into that and figure out some things and make it work. I was working that thing. I did go from LPN, bridged to my RN through a fast track program. I’m an Associate Degree Registered Nurse now and in school presently for my BSN.
I don’t want this moment to go by without me saying, certainly you and I have worked together, and you are an awesome nurse.
Don’t make me cry.
No, seriously. When I work with you, I know that the patients are being cared for appropriately, but then also, those intangibles that we just may not be aware of, or you’ll say, “Doc the patient lives here,” or, “The family is doing this.” That helps me to also to provide care for the patient. I just wanted to say, I thank you. You are a gift to nursing.
You are so kind. Accolades and flowers, all those things are good, but coming from you, that’s a big wow. Thank you.
You Are Smarter Than You Think: Susan’s Advice To Her Younger Self
More mutual admiration society. Let’s go back. If you could tell your 33-year-old Susan something, what would you tell her?
I would tell her, “You are smarter than you ever thought. You are bigger than you ever imagined. It’s okay to say it out loud.”
You are smarter than you ever thought, bigger than you ever imagined. And it's okay to say that out loud. Share on XNot only okay to say it, but sometimes it’s important for us to say it out loud to ourselves and almost on a regular basis.
That my kids would say, “Say it with your chest.” Nursing has been very good to me. I’m still fascinated by medicine and clinical care. I have such a thirst for learning more. I’m in depth of learning now in this BSN program. I think if my health is going to be good, then I’m going to continue until whatever that end of. I have aspirations maybe even to do my DMP or something similar. I’m so excited about it.
That fascinates me too because I still have such admiration for health and wellness and clinical care. Not always in the traditional settings that we work in, but in the entirety of holistic applications and this, like the conversations and having a listening ear and letting somebody use me as a sounding board. That thing is all encompassing part of our wellness.
Clearly you have a story to tell, lots of wisdom to share. You’re walking in your calling and the world is your oyster, honestly, with nursing and your passion for health and wellness. We need to spread the message loudly to our sisters. You’re already continuing to grow. You know that there are so many things that you can do.
I’d like to change course a little bit, because you are apparently, what I hear from Sylvia, a world traveler. We both love traveling. I’m probably the one that hasn’t done the most, but I will hopefully, in my lifetime, do so much more. As someone who’s traveled the world, what’s one destination that completely surprised you and maybe shifted your perspective?
Africa.
What about it?
Life-Altering Travel: South Africa And Lessons Of Resilience
I went to Johannesburg and South Africa, Cape Town, in the middle of the pandemic almost. It was when the most infectious part was over. We had a trip planned. I think it was to Costa Rica. The borders closed. We couldn’t do that. The replacement trip was either South Africa or Bali, I think it was. I was traveling with my niece, and she had already been to Bali, if I’m not mistaken. The replacement trip was South Africa. I said, “No brainer. South Africa It is.” We traveled to Cape Town with a women’s group that I belong to. I call them my village. Shout out to the whole experience. They hosted and did some empowering things with women.
In that adventure, we got to see South Africa. I did go see Robins Island, which was where Mandela was incarcerated. We went to Table Mountain, which is a big mountain in South Africa that looks like a table. It’s flat on the top. They did give back to a local community initiative that was called the Amy Foundation. The children from the local communities came on campus where we were and did face painting, African dancing and got to exhibit their education for as learning a skill. We gave back to that part of that initiative to help fund some of their education, to become concierge people. I got to see District 6, which was in the beginning of apartheid, a community that was thriving with people, all kinds of people, but mostly Black people.
Of course, Africa calls their Black people colors, which was a way to divide them. These people were cohesive. They didn’t adhere to that. That community got bulldozed and it’s thriving parts of life and families destroyed just outright. Unimaginable. Destruction. They bulldozed them out to slums and took that land.
I met a gentleman who was doing a museum of sorts. He had a building with relics, little things that were able to be taken out of the garbage. He displayed them for this exhibit, and he walked and talked with us during that time, and 5 or 10 minutes with this man was life altering. It gave me such aberration for us Black people and how we have overcome and are overcoming so many hurdles.
It could be part of something that wasn’t way back there. It’s somebody still on soil in Africa teaching these lessons and sharing that experience. It was life altering. He said something to me that I always want to share. I asked him if he could forgive some of the ills that were put upon them. He said, “Mandela said when he got out of prison that hatred was holding the knife by the blade.” The revelation of that made so much sense to me. When I’m pressured to think a certain way about a group of people or blanket statements about a person, I am cautioned with that warning, I would say, about hatred. It changed me for the better. I’m forever grateful for that trip.
I remember when you came back and we talked about your journey in South Africa, and I could feel the shift. I’m so happy. Thank you so much for sharing that with our audience. I think that certainly has relevance now when we look at the changes in the United States. We as a people, I’m going to speak collectively, how are we going to navigate these changes? When we look across the Atlantic and understand what we’ve done previously as a people, then I hope that that reinforces our resilience and helps us to think creatively how we’re going to work for the betterment of all of us. We will see. Only time will tell.
I have great hope and I know in my spirit person that we have all the things we need to do that and to become a people of solidarity no matter what the picture might be painted as, or how the story is being told to us, truth is something that is going to stand. No matter how it’s reeled or spun, it’s going to stand. Sometimes I think about they’re taking the history away, but we are the walking episcopal of our own culture and our own narrative is being developed like a verse in the Bible.
We are the scripture and we are the heritage that’s walking and talking, and we don’t have anything stopping us from doing just this, sharing those events and moments. The written part of it wasn’t done initially anyway. We were telling those stories. We have that capacity, we have that bound in our spirit. I don’t see that it’s going to change. It gives me hope to know that it could be the very thing that might bring us up out of a whole lot of injustices.
I don’t think I can add to your experience in South Africa. Let’s just go to maybe what else is on your travel bucket list right now.
Solo Travel Adventures: Embracing New Experiences In Thailand
My next trip is Thailand. I’m going for my birthday. I’m trying to see if I’m brave enough to do it alone. This will be my first adventure.
Solo travel?
Solo travel.
Susan, you got this. It’s the best. You can do whatever you want, when you want, how you want, where you want, with whom you want. Make sure your WhatsApp is connected and someone’s checking in with you every day. There are some security things for the door, but yeah, get a tour. You’re going to be great. I’m a huge fan of solo travel, as you can tell.
I’m going to adventure and see if I could get in your footsteps a little bit then, because I’d love to travel and I’m excited about the idea. However, I know there are some things I need to be mindful of. Maybe not high concerns, but just practical and common sensical. I’m so excited to do it, like you said, and with my own take on, “I’m getting up now. I’m not going to do that. I’m going to do this,” and not have the stuff having to negotiate.
You can do it. Whatever you want to do. I have a 23-year-old, Susan, who just did that and did all the things, did all the research and passed it all by us, but she was determined and did it safely and everything Sylvia said. Yeah, do it.
That speaks to who you are and depositing the courage. It takes a lot of bravery. That comes from the foundational parts of who she is. I think that’s so commendable. Kudos to her and you.
Kudos to her. I appreciate you. I hope that some of that came from home, but a lot of that is just that internal spirit, which I guess you can either cultivate that or tamp it down. I’d certainly feel like that that’s what we’ve tried to do. In terms of when you travel, do you have a ritual or some things that you bring that bring you comfort or clarity, or is just It depends on the trip?
I generally empty myself of America. I want to be open to the culture that I’m going to visit and to clear the space out for things that you’re told. That was a discovery from South Africa too. Your imagination can get the best of you with thinking this is how it is, and you have no idea. I just clear my space out, my thoughts out, and let the whatevers land where they will and try to observe for the experience to be cathartic and right then, be in the moment kind of thing. I try to set myself up for that and alleviate myself for fears. I have to tell myself sometimes, “Just do it afraid. Do it anyway.”
Susan, you always hit me to some new music or artist or whatnot. I think one of your sons is an artist and you connected me with, I think, Toby Nwigwe. Try Jesus, Don’t Try Me. I was like, “Yes.” It works in so many different contexts. If your soul had a soundtrack, what three songs would be on it?
The way I love music. Stevie Wonder. He has a song called As. It’s talking about, I love you as long as these things are happening or not happening. The way he describes it is some things that are never going to happen. If I’m loving you, as long as 8 times 8 times 8 is 4. Different things he says that it stretches your imagination for how far and wide that can be. I love the concept of that song.
Three songs. There’s a song by Alex Isley. It’s called About Him. It’s it could be about her boyfriend, but I see it in a spiritual way towards my children. It says, “I hope you know this song is about you. I’m going to sing it out loud because I want to,” and it is got some of the quippy kinds of sayings, but I could see myself singing that to my children and my grandchildren and to the Lord. It’s all like a manifestation song. I love that. The third one would be probably Marvin Gaye. Anything Marvin Gaye. He was prophetic to me. Before his time. Trouble Man is one that still resonates with me.
Appropriate for now.
Yes.
If you had an opportunity to whisper one message to every woman navigating through midlife right now, 2025, what would it be?
Susan, you say stuff to me that I’m like, “Yeah.” It helps me think at a higher plane. It changes the energy in the room. That’s why we wanted to ask you this question.
Your Heart Is Young: Wisdom And Joy In Midlife
It’s so many things that have become a-ha moments for me. I may be a little bit older than you guys, but because ageism is a big thing in this country, what I would say to her is your heart is young. We look at the exterior, but I could tell you for myself that I could see myself aging, but my heart desires and the things I attain to participate in and how I want to share and be part of community, all of those things are fresh and young.
Your heart is young. Share on XWe listen to, I think it was The M Factor, Sylvia. The conversation towards the end talked about how at this stage in life, we have so much wisdom. We have more to share than we ever have before. I’m not on a shelf. I’m out here to create, to do more, to spread more knowledge than I ever have before. I like that.
Thank you. Just imagine, I think about this setup and the mind frame that went into developing this show and the meeting of minds that you guys had and the connectedness and how that is so edifying for women, and especially women who have been challenged with who they are because of color. The biggest thank you I could send you, guys.
We’ll not here to be tearful. Thank you. How do you define joy now? I think that we’ve talked about wholeness. We’ve talked about forgiveness, which is really very important. That our hearts are still open and singing. How do you define joy?
Joy in all the little things. I find joy in so much. The fact that I can decide to have joy. When you come through so many things.
It’s a choice.
Joy is a definite choice. I love the moon and how it looks when it’s setting and how the sun rises. It makes me speechless. I love the beach and how the sand feels on my feet. I love the rest of my mother’s voice next to my ear and how my kids call me mom. I get so much joy from hearing my grandson say Nana, and how my children think that I have the answer to everything. It fills me with joy that they think I’m the person who knows it. Most often, I don’t. I’m looking it up on Google, too. Just to be in the warm embrace of sisterhood like this, what a joy. Mariah said something to me that I didn’t even remember. She was a guest on your show Mariah Morris.
Joy is a definite choice. Share on XYeah. She said that I told her something that I didn’t even remember, but I think the spirit part of who I am connects to the need sometime of other people, and I don’t squelch that anymore. I embrace that. I used to say in my head that that red thing, the white thing, that duality of who we are, it will fight your greatness. Once you get the know of the spirit, then it will come up in you. Sometimes, it’s not even of me. It’s something deeper than I’ve ever thought I’d be, but I’m a conduit for it. I’m the portal for it. Sometimes, it’s landing on me the same time it’s landing on that other person. I’ve learned to honor that in myself.
You have certainly honored us. It was just a conduit just then in terms of spreading your joy in all the little things that actually add up to be huge things in life and how you’ve poured into others in your life. Just seeing the joy that you get from that is incredible. Thank you for sharing that. Can you tell us, and I’m hoping to hear something really profound, but in terms of what your self-care regimen is, or maybe what it will look like? It sounds like travel might be one of those things.
Dating Yourself: Self-Care And The Healing Power Of The Cold Plunge
I love to travel. I do the most spontaneous things. My regular regimen of self-care is I date myself.
I like that. Tell us more.
I pick something or somewhere, or a restaurant, a self-absorbed thing. Not so much shopping anymore because I’m always doing that. One of the things I picked was I went to one of these bathhouse things. I walked around naked. I did that. I had one of those a-ha moments. It’s some hot springs or like a jacuzzi thing. One of them is super cold. I see people doing that plunge, and I’m like, “Whatever.” That might be a little bit much, but then something said, “Step in the water. There is something holy about it.”
I was thinking, “What in the world is this thought?” This girl was trying to get in, and I just went straight in. I said, “This water is going to heal you, girl.” She looked at me so oddly. I said, “Get in. It’s cold at first., but you keep going further and you don’t even notice it. How does this feel good?” I was just being very animated, and this woman looked at me and the tears were coming down her face. I don’t know what that lady was going through. It was an a-ha for us. I took that cold plunge, girl. It was something awesome. I advise everybody to take the cold plunge.
I was with you on the hot spring. My kids can testify.
I don’t know how to even describe it. You have to do it. You have to.
Next girls trip, Angela, we’re going to have to do a cold plunge.
Only for you. I’ll have to reflect. I’ll have to go back to this episode again, Susan, so I can get the courage. That’s great. I love that. I like the concept of dating yourself because that means you’re being intentional. You’re doing something that feeds your own soul without the constraints of anyone else’s timeframe. It’s based on when you can do it when you want to and something for yourself. I like that. I’ll add that to my list.
Solo travel is just one long date in another country.
I’m going to be in discovery mode. I’m so excited and starting to empty out some things so I could just be refreshed by whatever’s coming.
Susan Johnson, my heart is so full. We want to thank you for coming and just filling me with awe and gratitude.
I would have to concur. Sylvia has spoken so highly of you along the years, and I am honored to have met you. I am full from all the wisdom and the inspiration that you’ve given us. I definitely know our audience will fill this and take it to heart. Until we meet again, Susan, may you be well.
Thank you. I love how you guys say that. May you be well. Thank so much. What an honor.
Thank you.
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Sylvia, what a wonderful episode. It filled me up, especially at the end, but the entire interview with Susan, I appreciated her transparency and sharing her life story, what shapes us is part of the storytelling process. Passing down the things that worked in our childhood and things that didn’t. Maybe even for a lot of people, they’ve shared stories of how they’ve done things differently with intention because how we’ve grown up. Just amazing. The fact that she went to nursing school at 33. Just beautiful stories. I love those stories. In terms of pearls of wisdom, I have a few in mind. I’ll let you go first and you tell me what resonated with you.
Susan, for me, is just the embodiment of sisterhood. What we are doing here with Boss Leap is to have conversations and hopefully lead people with some things that maybe they hadn’t thought about or maybe affirm some things within that the universe was nudging them on. Susan is just the perfect conduit for all of those things.
She talked about honoring the voice within. You and I talk about that all the time. The still small voice within. Some people call that God or spirit, or the ancestors. However you refer to that, that is that internal voice that says yay or nay. Move or be still. Honoring the voice within. I really loved it when she talked about you have to be whole first, and I know you have some thoughts on that as well.
It’s just landed for me around the intentionality, around the work that goes into being an active participant in your own life. Living your dream life is what Rhonda Mattox talked about in one of our previous episodes. Finally, she’s such a music person. As is one of my favorite Stevie Wonder songs. I can sing it in my head. Just so many things I know that our readers will just glean, just awe and wonder with Susan. What are your takeoffs?
Yeah, it’s interesting what you said about how sisterhood resonates through her. She even said she’s sometimes just a conduit. I felt that. I know the feeling that you’ve told me about because I know that she’s also a friend of yours. I felt all of that. Some of the things that she mentioned, I don’t think I received them in the same way that she had necessarily used them in her life for, so for one, hatred. I think that was from Mandela. Hatred is like holding the knife by the blade.
Have I ever disliked someone a lot? Yes. Hated is a hard one for me. I don’t know if anyone that I can say I just absolutely hated. That dislike feeling. The way I received it is just holding onto some feelings that you can hold onto, those wronged type of feelings for a long time really does more to you than it does to the person.
They have moved on. They are not thinking about you.
They’re not even thinking about it anymore. For me, I’m trying to let go of things that may have happened in the past as long as it’s not something that is continuing to happen. It’s a hard one, but I like that analogy. The other one that I liked from her is she said she would set herself on fire, almost to keep others warm. That resonated with me. You could look at it in many different ways, but sometimes, you’re doing so much in the realm of helping others in your life.
Sometimes, it’s to your own detriment if you’re not looking inward and being introspective about, “How is this affecting me, helping me, and is this overall beneficial to everyone?” Such as working hard and not having time to sleep and not having time to really spend quality time with my kids and family. There was a point where, okay, that, that analogy that, that’s like feeling like I was on fire. There was good things that came out of that because I was delivering a lot of babies. That’s very gratifying, but there wasn’t the balance on the other end with how I felt when I got home.
Those are times where you have to, again, be introspective and sometimes make changes. So much that she offered. I loved everything that she had to say. Again, just so appreciative for her transparency throughout the interview. That’s what I’m taking away from it. I hope our audience gets that and a lot more. Until we meet again, may you all be well.
We want to thank you again for liking, listening, subscribing, and sharing. If you have any questions or comments, please don’t hesitate to send us an email at BossLeapPodcast@Gmail.com. May you be well.
Important Links
- Fear As A Motivator: Mariah Morris’ Journey Of Vision, Growth, and Grace
- Dr. Rhonda Mattox: Design The Dream Life You’ve Always Wanted
- Boss Leap Podcast Email